How do you know what God asks of you?

Husbands – If your love is motivated by God, your Wife will know it, and it will be reflected in the climate of your relationship.

Likewise – A Woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to see Him just to find Her.

When I’m talking with Catholic men about their personal holiness, one of the most common things that comes up is how a man says that he can never make his Wife happy. That no matter what he does to stay one step ahead of her, to fix things as us men are wired to do, she is often telling him what he is doing wrong.

My answer to this is simply to please God before your Wife. In other words, when we decide that we want to live life God’s way instead of our way, we are going to have to give up our way and trust that God’s way is better.

Our wives will see in due time how we’ve abandoned our own selfish ways, and get our ego out of our own way, and are waiting on the Lord to show us the better way. In other words, please God in all we do, before others, and your Wife will follow your lead.

God does not need you to do His work. He needs you do be obedient to His will. God’s will is that we depend on Him.

How do you know what God asks of you to please him?


The Holy Spirit is a very powerful aspect of the Holy Trinity, but I believe is taken too much for granted. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “listen to your gut”. What this means in the spiritual life is to listen to your ‘knower’. The Holy Spirit is the communicator for the Father and the Son, and lets you know what they are saying to you.

But the problem we have in our culture today is too many distractions. Things that keep us from true solitude to listen to our own thoughts and what we believe truly, and what God is saying to us truly.

We allow the news media and social media, and opinions of others, to influence what we think and all of this waters down what God is trying to say to us.

Jesus is the source of true power in life, and with your wife. Yet, when we seek our own power outside God’s will is to serve Satan, to be blunt with you.

Ultimately, us men live for an audience of One. God is the only One who is worthy of our affections and allegiance. When we compare ourselves with others, we quickly become consumed with pride or envy, and our passion for Christ quickly fades. To make the choice for Godly passion, we need to value God’s purposes more than distractions and getting ahead of others, and we need to care about people’s souls (including our own) than cars, clothes, and vacations.

It doesn’t come easy because, like the example of Jesus, it is through our struggles and being tempted by Satan beyond our self control that we locate the source of real strength, power, and true freedom in Jesus.

The benefits, as ‘they’ say, are out of this world!

You shall worship the Lord, your God,
and him alone shall you serve.” Luke 4:1

Frank J Casella is a photographer, and co-founder of Bishop Perry’s Catholic Chicago Men’s Forum.

Author: Catholic Men Chicago Southland

Catholic Men Chicago Southland (CMCS) fosters Catholic Men in personal holiness to make Jesus Christ the center of our daily lives, and sponsor of the Bishop Perry Catholic Chicago Men's Forum. CMCS is Catholic Apostolate of Most Reverend Joseph N. Perry of Chicago. Executive Director, Frank J. Casella Vision: To Nurture Catholic Men's Spirituality in the Chicago Southland